Role of parents

Let your kids enjoy the game.

The golden rule; if they are enjoying their football everything else will slot into place. Don't forget that it's kid's football and that's basically about playing with their friends and for fun - there's no need to make it complicated. There will, of course, be other reasons for playing (to improve their skills for instance), but if they haven't got a smile on their face then they are playing for the wrong reasons and that could be just to please a parent.

What do kids need from their footy mum?

First and foremost a positive involvement - as a parent, you'll be a big influence on them and they will want your support and guidance as they develop as a footballer. They will enjoy you being part of their football life and the more you know the more you will be involved. A few tips:

• Encourage them and their team mates at all times.
• Do watch as many games as you possibly can (as a footymum you'll not want to miss any of the action anyway).
• Keep winning (and losing, of course) in perspective.
• Always encourage them to play fairly.
• Be constructive and positive with any comments.

After that it will be down to all the practicalities of doing as much as you can to make it all happen for them. They might not admit it, but they will appreciate all the time you put in to helping them play their football.

'Competitive dad'.

There isn't anything necessarily wrong with being competitive as long as it is channelled in the right way. Too often some parents (and dads are the worst culprits) can push their kids too far. This might be through an over estimation of their own child's talent or it might be a question of them living out a second opportunity to fulfil their own football ambitions (having not made it themselves the first time!).

Speak up if you think that dad is being too competitive and adversely affecting your child. Very often, pushy dads can't see anything wrong in their actions other than thinking they are offering encouragement. Kids cite 'pressure from a parent' as the reason (more than any other) they don't enjoy their football. Don't let a 'competitive dad' spoil things and drive your child away from football.

Parents code of conduct

It's a sad fact that the behaviour of a minority of parents on the touchline leaves a lot to be desired. If the parents can't behave what can be expected of  the kids?! Click here to download a typical parent code of conduct that a club might issue. There are a few points here that will help you understand what you should and shouldn't do.

The FA Respect programme is a very good source of information on parental conduct. There is an online module to follow that showcases unacceptable parental behaviour and the consequences it can have on kids. It only takes a few minutes to complete and is highly recommended. You can find it at www.thefa.com/respectguide/

Managing expectations

Children develop so quickly. The child who shows exceptional ability as an under 9 may fall back by the time they are playing at under 12. Similarly, it isn't unusual to see kids blossom much later on in their football life; the average player becoming the star player.

Whatever standard your child plays at their performance will vary. Some days it goes well, others they'll feel that they can't do much right. Don't let them get carried away, but be there to give them a boost if it's needed.

A note on professional club academies. Many kids will get 'spotted' at an early age and invited for trials; if this is a successful period they will then be invited to sign for the club. If your child is selected (and it should prove to be a great and exciting experience) don't assume (and don't let them believe) that they are destined for a professional career; only a very, very small percentage 'make it' by playing the game professionally. Hopefully they will enjoy what could be a fantastic sporting opportunity whatever the final outcome proves to be.